Three of my family members have summer birthdays.
If you happen to know any of them, you’ve probably heard at some point about how much they despise it.
How much it sucks.
How no one remembers summer birthdays.
No one is around to celebrate.
Do you know what this mom has to say about all that?
First. World. Problems. Time to get over it.
Recently, my 13-year-old was trying to plan her birthday festivities when the complaining became too much for me. So I defaulted to an old-parent standby for whiny children.
Katie: Yeah, I know it’s tough being born and all. I’m sorry my water broke in the first part of August. It wasn’t fun for me either. But you should feel lucky! There are kids in third-world countries who don’t have…
At this point, I realized my point wasn’t going to translate correctly so I tried to stop and walk away. Unfortunately, Izzy realized it too and wasn’t about to dole out any mercy favors.
Izzy: Wait. Were you just going to say that there are third-world children who don’t even have birthdays? That’s physically impossible. If you’re alive, you had to be born on some day. Are you listening to what’s coming out of your mouth?
Katie: Well, some of them don’t have connections with their biological families, so they had to assume what day they were born.
Izzy: So, you’re telling me that there are people in this world who picked their own birthday? Trust me, none of them picked summer dates.
Sigh. Teenagers are too much. But since I’m legally obligated to show these kids love and all, I really do try to make their birthdays special. This year, I decided to go with Sign Gypsies.
Have you guys seen their work? They put out big custom yard signs to celebrate special occasions around town. My 11-year-old, Cambri, and I are obsessed with them. Every time we drive by one, it makes us feel like we should jump out of the car and run to the front door to wish Cameron (who we don’t know) a happy 15th birthday and tell him how happy we are he was born and that, based off his sign, he must love animals and the color blue, which we love too. We haven’t actually done it yet because we think it’s probably against the Sign Gypsies rules and it would most likely be jarring to strangers, but we are tempted. Just know, if we’ve driven by your yard sign, we’ve celebrated your special occasion with you by singing off-key happy birthday in our car.
So this year, I jumped on the website and filled out the form to have the Sign Gypsies come and decorate our house for Cambri’s birthday. I excitedly told my husband and, of course, his first question was how much does this cost? I weighed my options at this point. It was going to happen regardless, but I care about my husband’s mental health so I gave him the final cost minus 15%, because I’m a good wife.
Chase: Wow, that’s kind of expensive.
Katie: Umm, off my shoulder Satan. Not today!
Chase: I was just thinking of the budget.
Katie: Okay. That’s fair. I can make this work. I promise not to put gas or oil in the boat for an entire month to compensate for the yard sign to celebrate my youngest baby.
Chase: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let’s tell them we want two signs! One on both sides of the house?
Katie: I thought you’d come around.
Full disclosure. It’s not expensive to have the sweet Sign Gypsies come to your house and put up your yard sign. My husband’s confusion came from the fact that he legitimately has no idea what things go for these days. If you asked him what a birthday party would cost, complete with a custom cake, grab bags and food for 15 and a fun activity, he would literally say $30.
He’s the fun dad that rolls into the pre-planned party and brings it to life, but he’s not part of all the work, time and money that goes into these things. I’ve accepted my lot in life and this makes it okay for me to be vague about how much money we spend celebrating summer birthdays. Keys to a happy marriage, peeps, I tell you what.